Vermont is the state I love: A multi-part series (concluded)

Well, If I have to choose one or the other,
I choose to be a plain New Hampshire farmer
With an income in cash of, say, a thousand
(From, say, a publisher in New York City).
It's restful to arrive at a decision,
Andrew restful just to think about New Hampshire.
At present I am living in Vermont.

-Robert Frost, New Hampshire

I started this now ridiculous melancholy, melodramatic and regrettable trilogy a week ago and I guess it's now time to finish it.

The impetus for these posts came upon the news that friends of ours would be leaving the "State I Love" to pursue a job opportunity in Massachusetts. Normally that wouldn't have been a big deal, but tken on a whole, it was enough for me.

I've watched couple after couple leave the Green Mountains each year.

Jim and Gretchen were the first. They moved to NH because Gretchen could find work in her field (working with autistic kids) in Vermont.

Ben and Sarah were next. They both left to pursue career opportunities with a large grocery chain in MA.

Then there was Victor and Cara. They both hit dead ends in their careers and moved to NY.

Mark and Elisa hit the same road blocks and took jobs in Boston.

Mike and Michelle, same deal. They're now in Florida.

And the list goes on.....

For a state that has the oldest population in the country, we're not doing much to keep the young under 30 couples in this state.

Essentially they each hit dead ends in their careers and had to move out to find more opportunities. Now if we lived in Massachusetts or Connecticut would it matter? I doubt it. Vermont is, of course, the state I love. And for those of us who have either grown up here or gone to school here or lived here for some time, you realize that it is a special place.

Now, 30 is less than a month away from me. One more couple has announced they're leaving the state. I look around and am left with two questions:

Who's next?

Is it me?

Vermont is the state I love: A multi-part series (cont'd)

"I love Vermont because of her hills and valleys, her scenery and invigorating climate, but most of all because of her indomitable people." - President Calvin Coolidge, 1927

Born in Glens Falls, New York I guess I'm a New Yorker by birth. That always sounds weird because I don't associate myself with anything New York. I remember more about the farmhouse that I spent my first four years in than the other two house I would spend the next four.

My earliest memories outside of the farmhouse take place in what's called the Northeast Kingdom of Vermont in a town called Morgan Center on Seymour Lake. My grandparents had owned a summer house (we call them camps in Vermont) since the 50's. At one time, my family had four camps on this lake. I vaguely remember my great grandmother four camps down the road. My parents owned the camp across the street until I was eight. Two houses down were my grandparents friends the Cargills. Their front porch was also the post office.

Across the street, I went to church every Sunday. Yes it's true. I went to church every Sunday. To this day, I don't know what denomination that church was, and I often wish I could just write "Morgan Center Church" when asked religious preferences on documents. I took swimming lessons on the Gray's beach in July. I went to bible school (yup did that too) up the hill at the other, "winter" church.

We spent every summer up there. The best weeks were those when my parents left us alone with our grandparents. Those were weeks in which we were spoiled with candy and movies that my parents wouldn't let us watch, and early morning fishing trips.

The Kingdom is special place. It's a hard working people that live there. To say they are down to earth, doesn't give them credit enough. My sister classified it perfectly when she said, "You know how in some parts of the country people are just nice to you because it's polite? In the Kingdom, people are nice to you when you earn it."

There's something refreshing to me about that honesty.

My parents sold their camp when we moved to Massachusetts. We moved to Massachusetts in December when I was in the third grade. I remember this because I remember this because we even packed our Christmas tree in a garment box. I don't know that I was able to put two and two together, but I never really liked living in Massachusetts. I just never felt like I fit in for one reason or another. I think I was in middle school when I started thinking about colleges and I saw that as an opportunity to get out of Massachusetts.

Both of my parents went to UVM, and for as long as I can remember understanding what college is, that's where I was headed. When I graduated I was staying in Vermont - preferably the Northeast Kingdom.

Well, I did get to Vermont and I got into UVM. I found a school in Saint Michael's College that fit me and my needs better and enrolled and graduated from there in 2001.

Vermont was everything I had hoped it to be. By coincidence, the very first people I met at Saint Michael's were from St. Johnsbury, VT - my mother's hometown in the Kingdom. College life in Vermont was all I had hoped it would be.

After graduating, there was nowhere else besides Vermont I wanted to be.

(Part II of III)

Vermont is the state I love: A multi-part series.

"Vermont is the state I love. I could not look upon the hills of Ascutney, Killington, Mansfield and Equinox without being moved in a way that no other scene could move me. It is here that I saw the first light of day, here that I received my bride; here my dead lie, pillowed on the breast of our everlasting hills." - President Calvin Coolidge, 1927

I love Vermont.

I've been in love with Vermont for as long as I can remember, and I began thinking about this particular blog driving home one night on a dark Interstate 89 somewhere between the Colchester and Georgia exits. I was contemplating the recent announcement of a friend of mine was preparing to announce that she and her finance were preparing to leave the state.

I've lived in Vermont since graduating from college in 2001. Each year since, I've watched friends move out of state to either find work or for more opportunities in their career. All this despite efforts by state government to minimize such "brain drain."

I've found this particularly frustrating as Vermont is the place I've wanted to live for a long time. It's a special place where many of my childhood memories were formed. It's a place where I wanted to and went to college. It's a place where I want to raise my family. Yet, As I watch more and more of my peers leave the state, I can't help but wonder, "What am I missing out on, and when will that day come when I have to decide between career and the state I love?"

It bothers me that that question should exist.

Why do I feel like I've made a decision and a commitment to live in Vermont? Why do I feel as though I have made some sacrifice? Why do I feel that my out of state friends assume that I'm making a sacrifice by living here?

I think we'll need to start from the beginning of this relationship...

(Part I of III)

Say nice things, get good results

I've been off the map here for a while. I apologize. It's been a long winter, but if finally looks like spring has arrived here in Vermont.

I had a meeting the other day with our Director of Marketing. I had asked to meet with her she really understands Web 2.0 and I needed a sounding board with some ideas that I had for the future. We talked for a while, and then she told me that I was doing a good job and had done some great work this year.

That felt good. It had been a while since someone had said, "Drew, you're doing a good job. Keep it up."

It also got me thinking. It's easy to brush off the work that people do without passing a compliment. It's usually easier to criticize rather than praise, and it's easy to take coworkers for granted.

I think I've written about this before, but I see a lot of similarity between managing and coaching. I have much more experience with the latter and little with the former, but I have bee a leader on sports teams in high school and college, and I consider myself a leader in our office. So perhaps I should be writing more about leading rather than managing.

It is not easy to keep a fresh perspective and give a "good job" to those that you work with, but spreading the love like that keeps the workplace a happy place.

P.S. These posts will get better. I need to get back in blogging shape.